The plan (in my head) when we began on the Europe leg of our trip, was for me to write blogs every other day, go live on FB frequently, and build/launch my new online short course… all while being a most supportive girlfriend & enjoying the tours as we went. Yes, I said short course – Eeeeeee!!
Well, after the last few days of being internally hard on myself for not fulfilling those goals in their entirety, I have refocused and really thought about why things haven’t panned out according to my grand plan. You see, being hard on yourself can be constructive – and sometimes you just have to go through the motions to move forward. And more often than not, the grand plan can change without you realising. Because you can’t actually plan everything. That sneaky devil.
Our trip, to date, has been amazing! Out of this world. Something I have dreamed of for a long long time. A growing, learning, challenging & seriously fun experience. Not only have I seen a lot of the world (and we’re not even close to done yet), I have learned a lot about myself and witnessed some pure sexy talent, intelligence & worldliness along the way.
There have been a lot of cultural ‘eye-openers’ too. The truth is, it can be really hard being on the other side of the world. It’s not all unicorns and sparkles (WTF!?).
I have felt the feelings of being an outsider, not being able to understand the conversations around me, not being able to order food without feeling like a dick and at times I’ve cried about it. Don’t worry, I’m a cryer.. and if you hang out with me long enough, I’ll help you see that that’s not at all a bad thing. It’s an emotion. And emotions are to be felt.
There has been a lot going on. Generally hectic. It’s so easy to be hard on ourselves, especially when we are trying to step out of the comfortable seat and do something new. Like travel the world, speak your truth & launch courses and stuff…
Sometimes it’s a good idea to cut yourself some slack (she whispers to herself).
Because even though I haven’t posted as much as I thought I would, or been live on FB like I planned, shit changes. Plans change. Life is not a fairytale and sometimes… Shit. Just. Happens. And you roll with it. I realise now, that it has been vital to be immersed in the experiences and really let my insides grow.
And grow they continue to do.
Not to dwell though (in fact, it excites me), I have been writing… A LOT. And all of the blogs will make their sweet way online, just not in real time…because time waits for no one.
This is also a disguised blessing & learning curve, funnily enough, because going back over my pen smudged pages returns the memories so vividly and provides some crucial hindsight!
The way I feel inside now, having had this time, is that I know where I want to go, the things I want to pursue & I am more motivated than ever to keep writing, often. To keep building the course. To teach you, learn from you and share more of my experiences with you. In my ‘spare time’, I have been online a lot too; learning, listening, brainstorming and growing. All important things for the mindset, motivation and drive. All important things that I needed to take some time for along the way, and just be.
On a more front & centre note: I am also now well aware, that it’s time to kick my own arse. Continue to get the things really cracking that I’ve mentioned above, because no one else is going to do it.
No one else is going to build your dreams for you.
Which makes me wonder… What do you need to kick your own arse about today?
Bon voyage Europe, we will return.
To soul discovering, Jen x